Measure Happiness in Mundane Moments
- Don't mistake intensity of emotion for positivity in relationships. The highs and lows of a dramatic relationship aren't necessarily a sign of a positive connection.
- Focus on the average baseline of happiness in a relationship, rather than extreme oscillations.
- Intense experiences don't always equate to meaningful experiences.
- Measure the quality of time spent together in the dull moments to determine happiness levels. Evaluate your happiness during mundane activities like eating breakfast or reading emails, as that reflects the majority of life.
Meta-Emotions
- Avoid meta-emotions: Emotions are okay, but meta-emotions (feeling bad about feeling bad or good) are generally not. Feeling good about feeling good leads to pride, feeling bad about feeling good leads to guilt, and feeling bad about feeling bad leads to self-loathing.
- Accept emotions without judgment: Simply feel the emotion without judging it. It's okay, and it will pass.